Released in 1986, the original Witchboard‘s cultural impact lingers mostly because it stars Tawny Kitaen—known more for being a music-video vixen than an actor. But the stunt casting works: her character’s Ouija board curiosity turns tragic when an evil spirit takes a shine to her, possibly lured in by her perfectly teased hair. The movie delivers more cheese than frights, but you can easily see why it became a cult classic.
Less clear is why Witchboard needed a remake, especially one that only very lightly lifts material from the original, but you can’t overlook that catchy title. This new version, which comes from genre favorite Chuck Russell (director of fan-favorite Freddy sequel A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors, as well as The Mask and The Scorpion King), crams many more layers into its story, something that ultimately works against it. But it also unleashes some very fun, surprisingly macabre flourishes that help offset its shortcomings.
Any time a horror movie begins with a wild historical flashback, you can be certain it will impact whatever’s about to happen in the present day. Especially if the movie is called Witchboard, and the flashback involves a witch vs. hunter face-off and features a highly distinctive spirit board capable of summoning dark magic. Also, if one of the characters in the main story makes an offhand remark about being an orphan, not knowing anything about her real family, etc., you can start immediate speculation as to which 17th-century character is related to her.
Most of Witchboard takes place in New Orleans, a city that lends itself to eerie mischief as well as restaurant culture. That intersection is where we find Emily (Annabelle Comes Home‘s Madison Iseman) cheering on her fiancé Christian (Aaron Dominguez) as he and his friends prepare to open a new cafe. Emily’s finally feeling optimistic about the future following a stint in rehab, and she’s so confident in her relationship she only recoils a tiny bit when Christian’s glamorous ex, Brooke (Melanie Jarnson), shows up to the launch party.
And in fact, Brooke—who’s conveniently an expert on “shamanistic traditions”—proves immediately useful once Emily shows her the (highly distinctive) spirit board she found while gathering mushrooms for the restaurant. We know, of course, that the board was recently stolen from a local museum at the behest of the sinister Dr. Alexander Babtiste (Stranger Things‘ Jamie Campbell Bower). But the women don’t, and on the off chance that any horror fan who’s settled in to watch Witchboard doesn’t know how a spirit board works, Brooke’s there with a quick overview.
With context and exposition out of the way, Witchboard can dive into the goopy stuff that ends up justifying its existence. Once Emily starts experimenting with the board, bad things happen, starting with a fantastically grim kitchen scene that evokes the same tension the Final Destination movies tap into when setting up their elaborate deadly set pieces.
A later restaurant sequence is such an over-the-top screamer you wish Witchboard had fully leaned into that outrageous tone. It certainly seems willing; some of its best moments come courtesy of a charismatic stray cat that starts following Emily around. And Bower’s performance is so campy it gets in the way of him being a villain. This is a guy who lives in an antiques-filled mansion where he’s attended to by triplet witches styled like Daenerys Targaryen and throws Eyes Wide Shut-style solstice parties. He’s pals with Brooke, so he worms his way into “helping” an increasingly freaked-out Emily and Christian with his witchy expertise and an ulterior motive that’s made clear at the film’s climax.
Only, his plan doesn’t make a lot of sense. We won’t spoil the finer points here—not that we could explain them if we wanted to—but it ties back to that 17th-century clash and, much like the original Witchboard, threatens the soul of its supernaturally curious leading lady. Witchboard also presents a confusing approach to Wicca, drawing a careful line between “I use healing herbs” and “I worship Satan” and then proceeding to completely muddy it.
But maybe that’s overthinking it. This is Witchboard, after all. Though the remake won’t be knocking the original out of its place in the cult-movie pantheon, at least it keeps things gruesomely entertaining along the way.
Witchboard hits theaters August 15. If you need a little more hairspray with your spooks, the 1986 Witchboard is also streaming on Amazon Prime.
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