Finally, it’s time to end this miserable year.
If the 2020 memes are any indication, we’ve long been ready to start over. Perhaps, like the calendar meme posted by the actress Reese Witherspoon in August, you too have felt trapped in a loop that has only two settings: shock and despair.
The end of December typically brings fresh optimism, the conviction that by marking a milestone you can set new goals and imagine how your life may change for the better in the year to come. Of course, the coronavirus pandemic has upended that ritual, like it has everything else.
While there’s hope on the horizon in the form of widespread vaccination, we still face daunting unknowns, like how long it’ll take to for most of the population to receive the vaccine, whether the new stimulus bill will keep people from sliding deeper into poverty, and a timeline for when we’ll be able to hug our loved ones. There are looming threats to the stability we crave, including the possibility of a new variant of the coronavirus that may be more contagious, and a president who relentlessly seeks ways to overturn his election loss.
It’s clear that 2021 won’t look normal. Plenty of people don’t want the status quo to return either, after 2020 revealed it as fundamentally broken and unjust. What’s less obvious is how to move forward at a time when we traditionally yearn for new beginnings.
Focus on reality
The key to navigating this uncertainty is adjusting your expectations so they reflect reality. It’s possible to feel excited for the positive things that 2021 should bring without making ambitious personal or professional plans that depend on getting COVID-19 under control. That is simply out of your hands, and no amount of denial or pretending otherwise will conjure a different reality.
You can, however, give yourself grace if you want to wish COVID-19 away in 2021. Humans tend to loathe unpredictability, and research shows that feeling a lack of control is associated with anxiety and reduced mental and physical health.
Dr. Joshua Ackerman, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Michigan who studies decision-making and how humans respond to ecological threats, says people often search for solutions in order to relieve the anxiety of uncertainty. The problem is they frequently turn to the “quickest, most seemingly correct solution,” favoring a speedy resolution over evaluating the evidence for various options. That could mean relying on faulty justifications for forgoing a mask or seeing extended family indoors.
Right now, it’s particularly tempting to take the good news of an effective vaccine and behave as if we’ve reached herd immunity. As you reflect on your plans for 2021, you might feel a rush of excitement and schedule a trip or organize a family reunion.
But reassuring images of healthcare workers and elderly people receiving the vaccine don’t change the fact that the U.S. is in the midst of a harrowing surge. Based on a weekly average, more than 2,000 people have died each day over the past week, and the infection rate continues to rise.
Public health experts say that even with vaccines, people should expect to wear masks and practice social distancing for months as scientists better understand whether those who’ve been vaccinated can still transmit the virus. It’ll also take several months for at least 75 percent of the population to receive the vaccine, which should lead to widespread protection against COVID-19. It’s unlikely that healthy, younger people who aren’t on the frontlines will get their shots before the middle of 2021. (Check your potential place in line here.)
Make practical, safe plans
So, as you celebrate the start of the New Year, your optimism should be paired with a practical, safe approach. Waiting for good things to happen may require more patience than you have now, which is why it may help to practice mindfulness or meditation. Acknowledging the reality of the present moment, even if it’s disappointing or painful, can help steady the mind when it feels exhausted or overwhelmed.
Listen to public health experts and follow their recommendations for when to resume risky activities like hosting a birthday party or wedding, sharing a meal with friends, and vacationing with loved ones. When public officials flaunt these rules by gathering with family or going to a fancy restaurant, as Dr. Deborah Birx, coordinator of the White House coronavirus response, and California Governor Gavin Newsom have, you may want to rebel out of rage. Try to check that reasonable anger and concentrate on the steps it’ll take to safely attain whatever goal you have in mind.
“People focus on the outcome without thinking about the path required to get to that outcome,” says Dr. Ackerman. “It’s good to have that hope. It does increase the sense of control. We just want to make sure it’s coupled with the proper behavior.”
Dr. Ackerman recommends thinking about how you’ll handle situations that could interfere with your long-term goals, like if your friends stop wearing masks or invite you into their homes before it’s safe, which could lead to contracting COVID-19. Considering how you’ll handle such scenarios before they happen will help ensure you’ll act appropriately.
Dr. Ackerman says what excites him most about 2021 is that we have effective vaccines. Though he loves to travel, he’s just “looking forward to the idea of being able to get out into the world again” instead of making specific plans.
Such caution may not offer the triumphant opening to the New Year many people imagined or longed for, but there are genuine moments of hard-won joy to feel and envision. Think of the relief you’ll experience when an older parent or grandparent, or loved one who is a healthcare worker or first responder, gets their vaccine. Imagine schools reopening because of low infection and high vaccination rates. Picture sharing a drink with an old friend once they’ve been vaccinated and you have too.
These moments are ones to cherish, even if they’re not the stuff of ambitious New Year’s resolutions. One day, hopefully toward the middle or end of 2021, it’ll be safe enough to start making grand plans. Until then, take every opportunity to enjoy the victories that weren’t possible in 2020.