Welcome to No Shame November! This week we’re diving into the pop culture we love that society tells us we shouldn’t.


I’m pretty sure 2000s pop punk is the only thing that got me through my teenage years, and it’s still helping me through life now.

The music of this era came from bands — now with matured sounds — like Fall Out Boy, Paramore, and Panic! At the Disco. It was known for its upbeat tempos, blaring guitars, moody vocals, and adolescent themes. It was hated on for being too depressing, too whiny, too hardcore, and not hardcore enough. The music was often plagued by vaguely misogynistic lyrics, and the subculture surrounding it contained far too few bands led by women and people of color and far too many men who abused their power to harm vulnerable fans.

Yet despite all that was wrong with it, the songs still acted as a safe haven for the outcast, the lonely, and the depressed.

I was one of the kids who found solace in this type of music. It was the friend when I had none, the outlet for intense emotions I didn’t know what to do with, and the one thing I could count on to verbalize exactly what I was feeling. While I don’t rely on it now the way I used to, pop punk from an earlier era still hits certain notes for me that more modern music does not.

Sometimes I go back to a song I listened to years ago and realize it’s only good for nostalgic purposes. But far more often, I’ve gone back and found that it still represents how I feel right now, in my 20s, years after my first listen. Maybe I’m not dealing with the complications of high school and living at home, but the themes aren’t any less relevant for those of us who are now grown up — especially in the hellhole that is 2020.

Oftentimes hinging on the dramatic, this music doesn’t sugarcoat things. And now, more than ever, we need songs that are upfront and emotional, but still total bops. 

Rather than putting all the old pop punk and emo music away in a box — or more accurately, burying it deep on some Spotify playlist — let’s continue to embrace all the songs that still get it. These are the angsty themes of 2000s pop punk that I will forever hold onto.

Dissatisfaction with the world

Hayley Williams of Paramore in 2008

Hayley Williams of Paramore in 2008

Image: Kevork Djansezian / AP / Shutterstock

Girls weren’t supposed to be angry, or so I was told. But then I listened to Paramore, which had frontwoman Hayley Williams — with her brightly colored hair and fiery stage presence — saying exactly what she wanted. In a genre dominated by male artists, Paramore’s music was a godsend. It made me realize I could be mad about things, too.

The 2000s had the band playing songs with a heavy focus on fraying relationships, like “Playing God,” which rips at people who claim a position of superiority, and “Ignorance,” which deals with losing friends. Songs like these have felt cruelly relatable even after my teen years, as people — myself included — don’t get any easier.

Other bands, even those that weren’t led by women, helped me accept that my frustrations weren’t unwarranted, especially when I’d go to the concerts and meet other female fans who were also angry about reality. Songs like “I’m Not Okay (I Promise)” by My Chemical Romance, which is about someone struggling to recognize that you also have problems, or “I Don’t Care” by Fall Out Boy, which takes on the superficiality of society, were loud enough to express the frustration in my soul.

If there’s ever a time to be angry, it’s now. It hasn’t been a great year for anyone, and it’s perfectly fine to be mad about it. C’mon, don’t tell me you don’t want to scream one of these, at least a little bit.

The complications of unrequited love

Patrick Stump of Fall Out Boy in 2007

Patrick Stump of Fall Out Boy in 2007

Image: Getty Images

I had a crush on the same guy for most of high school and college. And it was hell. We were friends, but he dragged me along for years and teased the idea that something would happen between us, only to one day dramatically cut things off with no explanation. That’s when you need pop punk music. 

The guys in the songs oftentimes idealize, long for, and daydream about the girls who never love them back. I never imagined myself as the mythical dream woman all the pop punkers wanted — rather, I saw myself in the guys who felt scorned by the girls they could never get.

Can you tell that hard love was a big subject of the time?

The desperation of Fall Out Boy’s “Sugar We’re Goin Down” — which is the epitome of the complicated pop punk romance — was a cathartic escape for this broken-hearted teenager. The other songs of the era — “About a Girl” by The Academy Is…, “I Miss You” by Blink-182, “Hey There Delilah” by Plain White T’s, and “Jamie All Over” by Mayday Parade to name a few — similarly attack the struggles of strained love from varied angles. And even Paramore, through a female voice that echoed my own, tackled pained romance in a way that felt forever relatable through tunes like the spunky “That’s What You Get” and the life-destroying “All I Wanted.” (Can you tell that hard love was a big subject of the time?)

Perhaps relationships in your 20s hold a different weight than those experienced in your younger years. However, I’m sure I haven’t had my last rejection, and I bet it’ll hurt again. Future me is more than ready to drown out the heartbreak with songs like these.

The embracement of youth

Yellowcard in 2012

Yellowcard in 2012

Image: Carlos Larios / Invision / AP / Shutterstock

For all that’s awful about being a teen, there’s also a lot that — at least in retrospect — seems pretty magical. Things may suck when you’re young, but also, there’s a sense of free-spiritedness and opportunity that only seems to shrink as we get older.

Pop punk recognizes the appeal of being youthful and carefree. It rejects the mundane life and embraces one that’s full of excitement and possibility.

Good Charlotte’s “The Anthem” wishes for something more meaningful than a boring 9-5 and college degree. All Time Low’s “Somewhere in Neverland” and We the King’s “Check Yes, Juliet” similarly beg for a more enchanting life as the narrators muse about running away with their lovers. Bowling for Soup’s ’80s-reference-filled “1985” somewhat jokingly tells of a woman who, going through a mid-life crisis, thirsts to exchange her normal life for the dreams of her youth. And Yellowcard’s “Ocean Avenue” — despite sounding like a love song — is actually about the guys longing for the blissful feelings they used to have while hanging out and writing together in Florida.

Just because we can’t escape the harsh realities of life doesn’t mean we should stop striving to find the wonder, the freedom, and the escapism of these songs. I, for one, wish life could feel so carefree.

Frustration with oneself

My Chemical Romance in 2007

My Chemical Romance in 2007

Image: Alex Sudea / Shutterstock

It’s hard to be happy with yourself, and the pop punkers know this all too well. The external conflicts of the world are difficult, yes, but sometimes the inner conflicts hit even harder.

If songs like these meant something to us when we were young, they should really mean something to us now. 

There’s a lot of remorse in the music of this era, with narrators wishing they could control what they cannot. My Chemical Romance’s “Helena (So Long & Goodnight)” has frontman Gerard Way feeling angry at himself for not spending more time with his grandmother before her death. The Maine’s “Right Girl,” on the other hand, has the storyteller feeling like he missed out on the chance to be with a great person because he was drunk the night he met her. 

If songs like these meant something to us when we were young, they should really mean something to us now.

Then there are the songs that hint at inner battles with anxiety and depression, like Motion City Soundtrack’s “Everything Is Alright” or Relient K’s self-explanatory “Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been.” Once again, maybe we experience these feelings differently now, but they’re sure as heck not going anywhere. And while I can’t go to concerts at the moment, I can still blast the music loud and feel a little less alone.

The hope of something better

Jim Adkins of Jimmy Eat World in 2010

Jim Adkins of Jimmy Eat World in 2010

Image: Amanda Schwab / Starpix / Shutterstock

Pop punk is about being angry at the realities of life. But it’s also about hope, and believing there is something more than the sadness.

Have you felt the pure freedom that comes from rocking out to All Time Low’s it’ll-get-better anthem “Weightless?” Have you ever had perseverance bop “Move Along” by The All-American Rejects — no matter how melodramatic it might be — just hit you with a wave of enthusiasm?

Do you even know true joy if you haven’t at least once screamed Jimmy Eat World’s “The Middle” and meant every word of it?: “It just takes some time / Little girl, you’re in the middle of the ride / Everything, everything will be just fine / Everything, everything will be alright, alright.”

Sure, we’re stuck in a nasty year where everything looks bleak, but now is not forever. I’m going to stay hopeful about life getting better. I’ll be listening to every pop punk song — regardless of whether it’s a musical masterpiece or super-cheesy bop — along the way.

Angst doesn’t exist without a silver lining.