The president is very sad about the coronavirus pandemic. Not because 124,000 Americans have died so far, with thousands more cases being reported every day and millions of people out of work — but because those things make it look like he’s doing a terrible job. It’s also made it harder to do his favorite part of campaigning: packing red-hatted folks into indoor rallies to cheer while he makes vague, rambling promises and says racist and/or threatening things about Democrats and/or non-white people.
After Saturday night’s severely underwhelming turnout of 6200 in Tulsa, Stephen Colbert noted Trump had a much better time in a Phoenix megachurch on Tuesday.
“One of the biggest coronavirus surges is happening in Arizona,” said Colbert on Wednesday night. “And yesterday they introduced another well known disease vector: Donald Trump. The president was there to give a speech to a tightly packed auditorium of supporters, most of whom weren’t wearing masks. The only way it would have been more risky is if he’d revved up the crowd with a hepatitis cannon.”
As well as suggesting he doesn’t know what the “19” part of COVID-19 actually means, Trump leaned into the packed venue’s vibe, asking attendees if they could “feel the spirit.”
“Oh yeah, that crowd was feeling the spirit,” crooned Colbert. “It was in the air, spreading like a fever, their muscles aching with excitement and an enthusiastically dry cough. I wouldn’t be surprised if their lungs were filling up with spirit juice.”
Trump isn’t helping himself by exposing his most ardent supporters to a potentially deadly virus. Colbert pointed out that with a new New York Times poll showing him trailing Joe Biden by double digits, he can’t afford to lose anyone. But that’s not all.
“One disturbing part of this poll was the fact that 14% of voters would vote for another candidate would not vote or did not know,” said Colbert incredulously. “Did not know. How the hell do you live through three and a half years of Donald Trump and have no opinion? ‘What’s that? Who’s president? Donald Trump? The guy from The Apprentice? Well, I missed that one. I was binge watching a marathon of Kevin Spacey movies.'”