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Jimmy Kimmel, one of the only late night hosts not taking the week off, got to take full advantage of the wealth of material from Memorial Day weekend in his Tuesday monologue. From the president golfing through a holiday weekend dedicated to casualties of war in the middle of a pandemic, to folks taking to beaches and pool parties as though we’re not, again, in the middle of a pandemic, Kimmel traced an especially silly, and possibly deadly, weekend of pandemic life. And while the Trump White House’s politicization of mask-wearing copped a spray, the host was just as frustrated with the fatalistic, tribalistic, or plain ignorant attitudes of people heading out to party while shrugging off the CDC’s strong recommendation to wear masks to prevent asymptomatic spread of coronavirus.

“Of all the fights we’ve had over the last few years, this one makes the least sense,” Kimmel concluded. “This is the dumbest stand-off ever. We all wanna go back to work, we all wanna go out to eat, we all wanna hang out, none of us want to see people die. So if wearing a mask can help slow the virus and help get us back to normal sooner, why not wear a mask? It’s so selfish. 

“Are these people also refusing to wash their hands? Or is that for wussies too? I bet half of those idiots in that pool in the Ozarks put sunscreen on. If you’re not wearing a mask, you’re not allowed to wear sunscreen either. That should be the rule. If you don’t care about my wellbeing, you’re not allowed to care about your own.”